Today - February 12

February 12^th.

A brilliant day! Absolutely brilliant day!!

I don’t care what happened this day earlier in any year till now. Feb 12^th, 2010 is the best among them.

Today is Shivaratri. This day, oops, rather this is the night when people worship Shiva, or the most subtle existence of Universe. I have been listening since last few months Shivaratri is very auspicious. We should stay awake and meditate whole night. The whole cosmos comes alive with lots of energy and many more things.

So as I got up in the morning I thought what should I do today? In the afternoon we were going to the Ashram. But what till then? So decided to keep a fast. Just like that! By 2 in the afternoon my stomach was going upside down and my mind was looking for something to grab by mouth here and there! I resisted with one Banana thinking that fruits are not a strict No-No in a fast. J

At 4 we started for the Ashram. I never drove a scooty on busy packed Bangalore roads. Unfortunately the girl who’s scooty it was and with whom I was going, also never did the same! But I found it safer to take the back seat while continuously saying in mind, ‘Jai Gurudev! Jai Gurudev!’

So we reached safe and secure. And that’s when things started becoming beautiful. We had a MAHA RUDRA Puja for one hour and fifteen minutes. I generally find it difficult to sit for so long with my legs folder, but, Oh God! I did it with complete ease. And when I came back from deep meditation it was refreshing like never before. But surprises kept coming! J

However it was dinner time. Since I was still keeping fast, again a Banana and a yummy cup of Hot some milk. Guruji was in Kolkata and at 7 in the evening we were going to have a live telecast. So everybody kind of rushed back. And came the surprise. Same day. Another RUDRA Puja. Again super meditation time. I did not what happened then. But I realized only when it got over! Followed some Bhajans. Guruji went in full trance. A wave of magic was spelled. And then those idiots stopped the telecast at 10!!!

And much to horror people started leaving! Were not we supposed to stay awake all night? Sit, meditate? Since they were closing down we had to also leave. Reached home around mid-night. Did not want to sleep. So went to the roof top. The sky and starts and the breeze – they all said something was different that night! There was a touch of elegance in the whole atmosphere and the environment. Hoping that next one I will get to spend with Guruji Himself, I went to get a delightful sleep.

Jai Gurudev!

Love!

Mini And Miki

Since last three weeks I have been going to Gokul’s house in the morning to listen to Narada Bhakti Sutra – the aphorisms’ of love. He has got two cute dogs in his house – named Mini and Miki. The story is about them and the love.

Though I love dogs, I was very careful in the initial days more because I had an open finger in my left foot without the nail. So I did not want to get into more troubles, especially after the scary stories people told me with an uprooted nail. By the way the dogs were also shy, especially Mini. She will just run off whenever she sees someone.

However, slowly and gradually Miki became very fond of me. The moment I will go, he will come to me and stretch and jump and go round-round, whatever he could do with me. And I will be always cautious that he does not close to my left foot. But Mini would never even bother looking at me. That was not very warming.

Come on! I understand I never had a good luck with a girl ever in my life. No girl friend. No love factor. I kind of accepted that and kept on waiting till it happens, with a hope that it will happen sometime. Don’t be misguided. I am quite charming!! Hmmn, but even a dog has this much distaste for me based on gender discrimination. Miki was very frank. But she, ummn hun, no chance. One day I was just calling her waving at her, and she came back shouting. God! I said enough is enough. I do not care if she does not like me. Ladies have some issues anyways.

After few days I see that she goes to another person (a guy only) quite enthusiastically without any provocation and sits beside him and enjoys all the caressing. Okay! What was wrong with me? I could do better than that! You have not seen my skills. But unfortunately, she was still hesitant. And since she already greeted me once with sharp shouts, I was also less interested.

However, on the last day after the talk, I was outside and Mini, Miki both were there. By now Miki was so relaxed that would literally jump on me and put his front legs on my chest. But then Mini also came closer compared to the other days and as I just rubbed her neck she came real close and I knew she was enjoying it. So I touched her back and gently caressed her. But Miki seems to be quite upset with it. He just came in our way and wanted all the attention.

Two things that I understood -

- First one thing we all always strive for is love. Even the animals. A gentle touch, a little caring, a soft kiss, a warm hug. We don’t need violence, hatred, and jealousy. Life is quite beautiful without these when Love is there.

- Secondly, ladies take their own time with me. But when its time, they can’t be without me, they can’t resist! I am waiting for that one special lady …

Jai Gurudev!

Love!

Poush Sankranti

So here is story of Poush Sankranti which is also better known as Makar Sankranti or Pongal or Lohri or Bihu. This is the day when Sun transitions from one zodiac to another in its celestial path. In the parts of India where I belong to, Sun transitions from Poush to Magh and so it’s called the Poush Sankranti (Sankranti meaning the last day of the month). And it’s been a quite special day from my childhood.

Actually things started to happen from a day earlier only. On the previous day in the afternoon Moms and grand Moms will sweep the Aangan of the home (what you know as courtyard) with mud and cow dung. Now it might not sound very beautiful, especially in the urban locations. There is hardly any concept of courtyard or open lawns or playing areas for children. But as I have grown up mostly in the remotest villages of India, I saw all those things happening. And I can bet it was so beautiful. The whole courtyard used to look so spic and span. And when it dried up the fresh smell always used to be a pleasure.

Then by the evening again it was time for Moms and grand Moms to get their hands busy with coconut, milk, rice powder, jaggery and many more sweet things. This was the best part of the whole occasion for us. Because we used to get to eat lots of Pithas (sweet dishes made of all those above) not only at our own home, but since everyone will follow the same ritual and invite everyone else, it used to be a gala treat time for us. So we will all leave our books aside and sit sown with them to see those beautiful things getting ready to go to our big belly.

Also all the kids from a locality will gather together and arrange for a picnic on that night. They will get a makeshift house done with khair (I do not know what it called in English, basically it is the left over of the plant after the farmers used to pick up the golden rice from them) and bamboos. In the cold winter night they will stay in that small house and prepare dishes like chicken for everyone. And in the morning they will all get up, take a cold bath and then set that house on fire and soak in the blazing heat of the fire. Oh God! It used to be such a fun and pleasure that can not be described. Imagine you get up at 5 on a chilled morning, its all foggy around, you take bath in freezing cold water and then do not even wait to dress up properly but run to the fire! The joy it used to give was just unbelievable. And remember that I told about the bamboos. So whenever the joints of the bamboos catch fire it used to burst making sounds like, ‘pot, pot’! And we used to count those! :D

I remember two incidents particular to this. First, when we were in a very very remote village. Now on the two sides of our home, there were two families and the kids of those families were not fond of each other. Even the grown ups were not, I guess! However, so they will make separate picnic spots within a distance of 100 meters and woo each other in verbal arguments. So once it went so far, that one party literally bombed the house made by other party to set it on fire in the middle of the night. Oh my God! It was such a chaos. That time the grown ups actually had to interfere and calm things down. Since the house was already burnt, next morning they had to put a huge wood to keep the fire alive.

And in the next story, when we moved to a very remote village I hardly knew any of the kids there in the neighbourhood in the initial days. But I wanted that fire on the cold morning. So what to do? Now in winter during this time of the year the trees will shed leafs and in a village there were more trees in a house than what you can see in a block of a metropolitan. So what I will do is start collecting those leafs from one week earlier and on that morning use them as a complement for the house and it used to work pretty fine. Oh btw, we used to call that picnic house as ‘Burir Ghor ’ (the house of the old lady).

And as the Sun will rise and they clock will tick our feast used to start. After finishing off the first round quickly at home, we will set off for the whole locality, going from houses to houses and eating those delicious Pithas. These things are so tasty, and sweet and rich that even we will feel like our stomachs are already full but will never give up!

That’s not the end of the story! We will finish off our lunch also quickly. Because after that we will have loot! Yes, you read it correct. It used to be called loot only and the concept was also somehow similar to what you can think of generally. Actually what used to happen is, a group of people, whom we would call ‘Baishnov Dall’ (the Brahmins) will come to every home. They will sing with Dhol, Kartal and at the end of it they will through some dry sweets (Batasha, Kadambo) among the people and we will go and fight for those! Now you could buy those at the market but there was a secret for doing this. So that’s how the name loot was originated.

Now we would collect as much as of those sweets we could and get them home. We will give all that to our mother and ask her to prepare Mistanna (Payesam or Kheer) with those. No one will probably disagree to the fact that it will not make any difference to the taste of the Mistanna but for us it used to taste sweeter, if I may say so. And so in the evening we will have another round of the feast. But you know at the end of the day … after all these overdoses of sweets and sweets and more sweets the only thing we would look for is – a simple dish made my Mom for the dinner. And that used to taste heavenly, no doubt!

Jai Gurudev!
Love!

* * * * *

Its’ been seven years that I have ever done any of these things. So this year I decided to try all those things (like making Pithas which I never ever did earlier) and see what happens. After all, all this is for fun only, no? So I bought some stuff in the evening and started with the coconut, till then all went fine. Also I put the alarm at 6 in the morning to get up and take a bath. But since I went to sleep at only 12 in the night, the earliest I could get up was at 8. However I collected some leafs from the front of the house. Took a bath, well, not with cold water but with hot water. And then went on to get some heat from the fire. Finished my meditation. Started making those Pithas. It was an utter disaster, not to mention. However, I could make a few of those for me and my friends. So when my parents called in the evening, though we laughed about it, I told them that at least we got to taste those for the day. And they will be happy to know that, I still remember those beautiful days and tried to keep that culture alive in me. Next time I sure can do better! What say? :-)

Today I am very ‘Happy’!

Today I am Very Happy.

Life has been quite busy since last one year. There has been lots of turbulence, doldrums and ups and downs. In one word it had all the drama and the emotions. Office and work was challenging and at the same time very interesting. But at the personal side of the life there has been a lot of pressure. Family, health, friends, carrier and love and life! At times it seems quite difficult. When I looked up there was no one, literally no one. A battle fought standing alone. There was support, but at far distant. There were hands to hold but the reach was not enough. So a grueling battle continued for a long time and finally I along with all my loved ones was able to come out of the misery of the pain and adversities. From nowhere I managed to find some resolute strength within me which helped me through that passage of time.

But even then things did not look very pretty as nothing was certain. There was an uncanny sense of anxiety all through out. I was hoping that we all recover from it as quickly as possible before the next dawn. And finally it happened. I found Him or He found me. That was also long due. I saw him or rather listened to Him for the first and only time (before now) in Two Thousand Two. That was more like a glimpse. But that itself was enough to leave behind an everlasting impact and so it had to happen sometime. And it could not have come to me at a better time than this.

That day itself I learned to remain happy even during the darkest of hours.

But that was not all of it. Could not be. I knew that and I wished He also knows that. And sure He knew too! It was a matter of time. He changed me. He did not try to do it in the first day. It happened gradually. Not during the first course. Not fully during the next course. But at the third time it all opened like a flood gate. It blown me away, not brainwashed. Because with time I learned to accept it. That came with His blessings or at the form of His blessings. Because of that I am changed today, for better. I know how to deal with things better now; I know how to be happy always. And it’s because of His teachings few months back while I was back home; I could talk to my parents like never before. I completely opened up and thus helped my parents to know more about me. I could have never realized unless, that the moment I had grown up; I have actually started to drift away from my parents, their feelings. I never shared my lies and happiness with them, I did not worry about much what they think or want, I could never gave them a hug or say, ‘I love you Ma! I love you Baba!’ How I wish how much they wished for all these.

But now things have started to change. As I told I was more open. I could easily share my secrets with them; I could say them all the things that I wanted to. And they listened to all of those very patiently and closely. It felt like I was close to them again. I am sure irrespective of how uncomfortable it was for them to know about my habits, crushes and secrets right from my own mouth, they would have felt much better at the end of it. But still I could not say to them, ‘I love you Ma! I love you Baba!’

And so I wanted them to experience the same. I was all the while praying to Him that, ‘Please! Please! Make them come to You they way I have seen it. Let them feel the same.’ And there was instant help. One of my aunty who herself was a teacher came for help. She spoke to my parents. When I asked them to go for the course, they agreed but it could have taken some more time. But with the help of that teacher, I am sure it became much easier. I wanted them to go and do the course, because it was very much required for them. Anxiety, Tension, Stress and Loneliness were their daily accompanies, in spite of all my attempts. They needed Him.

Yesterday when they called up I spoke to them for little over fifteen minutes. Normally it will last for 1-3 minutes maximum knowing about each others health status and at times few new updates. But yesterday I spoke to them about the technique they are going to learn, they experience they are going to have. And it was wonderful. They joined the course.

Today they are going to experience all of it. He has come to them now. Now I pray let this be a journey traveled together forever where they will find the complete peace and happiness. And now I am ready to say, ‘I love you Ma! I love you Baba!’

Today I am very very very Happy!

Thank you Guruji!!!